Key Takeaways
You are not there to sell. Networking events are for meeting and learning about people, not for hunting leads or giving pitches.
Aim to be the connector. The best networkers focus on introducing people who need help to the people who can provide it.
Listen more than you talk. Focus on understanding someone's business and passions rather than immediately turning the conversation toward yourself.
Bring a wingman. A partner helps you cover more ground, provides an exit from bad conversations, and offers a second brain for comparing notes afterward.
Stay off your phone. Take short notes where you need to with a small notepad and pen. Your phone invites distraction and can make you look disconnected.
Who this article is for
This article is for sales professionals who don’t like going to networking events, who feel like these events are all phony or insincere, or who feel confused about what they should do to make real connections at a networking event.
The networking event. The business mixer. The industry meetup. Whatever you call them, they evoke a lot of strong emotions from most salespeople and we get a lot of questions about them in our training sessions.
It’s a love-hate relationship; and it’s understandable as to why one might feel that way.
I hear things like “Aw, they feel phony,” “everyone else is just here to try and sell, too; they’re pointless,” and the list goes on and on.
That’s a key giveaway that they’re not seeing these events for what they are and that they’ve got the wrong mindset about them.
But what is the right mindset? How can you go into these without feeling awkward and sales-y? And what are the tools you can bring with you to improve your chances at making connections?
Let’s dive into this topic together. I want to share with you why networking events are more valuable today than they’ve ever been and how you can start becoming the connector in your industry.
What Should your Goals be as a Salesperson at a Networking Event?
If your first instinct is to answer, “Well, duh! To make sales! To get leads!”
Stop. It’s not called a “Sales event.” It’s a networking event.
To meet and learn about people
That’s it. Nothing more. You’re there to understand who people are, what they do, why they do it, what their passions are, their hobbies -- again: just meet and learn about people.
You’re there to find people who actually care about what they do and the people they do it for. You’re there to build relationships with those people that are.
And you’ll find them. Trust me, it’s a breath of fresh air when you do. You’ll find a kindred spirit in the other folks who are there to also genuinely connect with others.
To gain an understanding of how you can help others
If the opportunity should arise to learn about someone’s business, great!
But just do that: Learn about their business. Ask them why they got into it. Why do they enjoy it so much?
Maybe they’ll reveal what they don’t enjoy about it or what they wish could be easier. But you’re not there to immediately turn that conversation into a pitch.
Keep that information to yourself. Take down a mental note where you might be of service to that person -- whether it’s through your business or by connecting them to someone else.
To become a better connector of people
This is the real heart of networking meetings and the best networkers know this. The key to great networking is to be the connector.
Be the person introducing someone who needs help to the person who can help them the best. People don’t forget those moments of earnest assistance and connection.
“Dave, hang on. I actually know a great person -- Monica’s her name -- and she’s exactly who you need to talk to. She’s the best at that.”
Be the connector.
You’ll soon find yourself with the reputation of being the guy or gal who just seems like they know everybody in town (or industry, county, etc.).
Over time, this snowballs into more and more people seeing you as an important person to know, an important member of that industry, and a key player in the overall community that you’re serving.
What Should Salespeople Bring with Them to a Networking Event?
Like we touched on just above this portion of the piece, the most important thing to bring with you is that connector mindset. But you also need to come equipped with a few things that make your authenticity shine through and boost your chances of coming away with more, real connections.
Your wingman
Having a wingman with you at a networking event is an absolute game-changer.
You can cover more ground, you can listen and collect twice as much information, and you’ve got a handy exit from bad conversations -- and an easy in-road into conversations that are especially good.
Ideally, your wingman will be someone who compliments your skills, shoring up any points where you might be a bit weak.
Feel out who has the best social skills among your cohorts at work. They’ll likely be your best bet.
Afterwards, get together with your wingman and compare notes. Share your most interesting conversations. Talk about what you learned.
Two brains are always better than one.
A small notepad and pen
Yes, I know you can take notes on your phone. But looking down at your phone gives distraction a chance to creep in. And it can look to others -- who might be wanting to connect with you -- like you’re disengaged.
And when you physically engage in the act of writing things down, it commits it more strongly to memory. Use it to keep track of important people and a couple quick details.
Don’t take notes as you’re talking to people, but during the brief lulls of connection or when you’re sitting down to eat (there’s almost always food at these events).
Business cards
These aren’t for wantonly handing out to everyone; again, you’re not there to sell.
Your business cards are reserved for people with whom you’ve made a connection. Think of the great conversation as the first brick in the bridge toward the relationship you’re building; that business card is the smaller second brick.
It’s how you’ll contact one another and link back up for coffee next week. It’s how you’ll stay engaged.
Yeah, you can trade contact information on your phones, but the physical card in their hand is quicker and doesn’t get lost in their sea of hundreds of other contacts.
They’ll remember you when they take it out of their wallet or pocket. It’ll linger on their desks and they’ll glance at it from time to time. And they’ll think of it when you follow back up with them.
It’s more of a memorable, concrete touchpoint than yet another contact in their phone’s list.
Bonus Tip: Don’t Talk About Yourself Too Much
I wanted to especially touch on this because it’s easy to have happen: Don’t talk about yourself too much during these conversations.
Sure, a good conversation is give-and-take. It’s a back-and-forth. But keep watch as to how much you’re talking about you, your business, etc. If you feel the ratio slipping too far into the “you” category, politely shift the conversation back toward them.
“But, hey, I’ve been talking way too much about myself here.” And then start in on your next question about them.
Conclusion
When you focus on others, it takes all the stress off of yourself.
You don’t have to make a perfect pitch because you’re there to learn about others. You’re there to be the connector.
Be engaged. Be present. Stay off your phone and take short notes here and there -- whatever helps you be a better helper, listener, and connector of people.
And bring a wingman if you can.
See you guys in the next one.
—Ed
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